Toxic
by Kommi
Summary: A struggle can often times be an opportunity for self growth - but at the time she couldn't see that. A quick solution to her problems and a desire for a deserved vengeance drove her towards something she wasn't sure she understood. But when your thoughts are heavy, it's hard to see the red flags.
1. Humble Beginnings

Trials and Tribulations

Uraraka had been living a life of self imposed limitations since her quirk had first manifested, a desire to make her parents happy driving most every action she made. But after a tragic event tears her parents from her grasp, she must quickly come to terms with these feeling that she has never experienced before. And with the most dangerous enemy she has ever had to face looming not far ahead, hopefully the strength she manifests can carry her through yet another obstacle.

X

I'm gonna try to have a backlog of at least a couple chapters so I can be sure to update every couple weeks, but with the semester starting soon things might change so please don't hate me!

Also, I may have taken some liberties and interpreted quirks slightly differently than what the manga has shown, but nothing too extreme. Hopefully y'all can forgive me.

I'm only on chapter 130 of the manga, so I'll try to remain as canon as possible with the information I have. If you are ahead of me though, hopefully I don't contradict anything too extreme that will make you hate me!

Constructive criticism is always welcome! Reviews help motivate me to keep this thing going!

X

She awoke with a start, a dark ambience overcoming her figure as soon as she began opening her eyes. A dead weight pushed down onto her chest and strained her heart, almost making her give a quiet moan of displeasure. Something wasn't right, she could it. She wasn't one to believe in bad omens such as these ones, but there was no denying the way that she felt. She pushed herself out of bed as quickly as her still fatigued arms from the previous day's training would allow, allowing herself only a quick stretch before making her way out of her dorm room.

From the way the dimly lit hall lights only scarcely penetrated the outsides darkness; she could tell that it was still extremely early, hours much earlier than ones she normally would have awoken during. All of the other students were presumably fast asleep in their rooms, some of them snoring loud enough for her to hear all the way out in the hallway. She gave an internal sigh of relief, she was in a huge hurry and having to explain herself to everyone as she left would have only slowed her down.

When she stepped into the common area, she was disappointed to see that the overhead lights were still on. The students in the dorms weren't usually forgetful enough to keep lights on (especially after the huge stink Eraser Head had made about the electricity bill in the place), so it was safe to assume that someone had still been awake. She cursed lightly, but knew that she couldn't avoid whoever had been in the room. She entered after reaching that conclusion.

Inside, the familiar form of a crow-like UA student sat comfortable on the couch, a dark shadow surrounding his neck and a rather complex book in his hands taking up most of his attention. His attention was immediately turned to the new figure entering the room when he heard the door open. He cocked his head to the side in confusion once he saw who had entered, not much unlike a dog.

"Uraraka?" He questioned, closing the book that he had been reading and patting the sleeping form of his quirk that had squirmed its way around his neck comfortably. "What are you doing out here, do you realize how late it is?"

Uraraka felt a sense of relief as her eyes glazed over Fumikage's dignified form. The worst case she could think of would have been if someone like Katsuki had been in the room, and she was happy to avoid something as time consuming as that. No matter who it had been though, she had to find some way to talk herself out of too long a conversation. She didn't know what was causing it, but something told her she needed to get to wherever she was going as quickly as possible.

"I couldn't sleep is all…" Uraraka confessed sheepishly, her hand playing with the hair behind her head. She had only half lied at this point, so it was nothing to be too stressed out about. "I was just gonna go on a quick walk to tire myself out."

"As if this morning's training hadn't already done a good enough job at that? I could have sworn that you having to use your quirk for so long and on so many people would have helped you sleep like a baby." Fumikage mused, thinking back to earlier that day with a smile on his face. "Not that we don't appreciate it, mind you. We surely would have lost that battle and been significantly more worse for wear if you didn't save our asses."

"It's not a problem really, I've been practicing with it a lot lately and my control has gotten a lot better. I would have to pick up a couple cars now to get really tired." She responded, a quickness in her tone that Fumikage was quick to pick up on.

"It's nice to hear that, it's always nice to hear that an ally is becoming more dependable…" Fumikage trailed off before quickly changing topics, "I must implore you, by the way, to let me accompany you on your walk. You heard Eraser Head talking about how much crime has increased recently. I can't in good faith allow you to go on your own, especially considering that it's-" he glanced down at his watch, "almost 3 A.M."

Uraraka wanted to argue, but something told her that convincing him would be a long process that she didn't have the time for. And besides, this feeling in her gut filled her with an anxiety that hopefully having someone else tag alone would help with. Reluctantly, the shook her head in his direction. "That's fine. You ready to leave now?"

"Sure," Fumikage stood up from his seat and placed the book he had been reading on the end table next to him, "So where did you want to go? Just walk around aimlessly for a while?"

"Something like that…" Uraraka responded, not fully knowing the answer herself. She didn't know exactly what she was doing or where she was going, but she hoped that things would work themselves out as time passed.

And so with that, Fumikage and Uraraka stood side by side and walked at a pace just slightly faster than normal towards nowhere in particular. They almost looked to be moving completely randomly, with the two of them turning to walk through different side streets and alleyways without much thought. Fumikage raised his eyebrow in interest, but didn't say anything. He had already invited himself onto this walk in the first place, there was no sense in him also questioning whatever route Uraraka had decided on.

Ururaka felt like she was following a feeling in the pit of her stomach, but at the same time she also felt that she had no idea exactly where she was trying to go. At some points she felt like she was heading towards something in particular, but at otherse she could obviously see herself passing spots that she had already passed before. Before she knew it though, she found herself in a part of town that she instantly recognized.

"I guess we're going to my place, if that's okay with you." Uraraka turned to Fumikage as she said this, receiving only a quick nod in return.

"That's fine with me. I don't think that I'll be able to go back to sleep anytime soon anyway, so I'm not in a hurry." Fumikage responded, looking ahead, "Hopefully your parents don't mind you stopping by so late. Or so early, I should say."

"I'm not going to bother them, I just want to check on something real quick…" She squinted, tossing and turning her brain trying to figure out what exactly it was that she was trying to figure out. "Why were you up so late, anyway? Or up so early, I mean. I could have sworn I was the only one."

"My dark shadow was restless and kept me up all night." He responded, lightly poking the dark form that still laid coiled around his neck. It squirmed lightly and gave out a soothing 'coo' before settling back down again. "I don't know what his deal is, he's almost never like this."

Did the way that the dark shadow had been acting have anything to do with this feeling that she had awoken to in her stomach? It was a bit of a stretch as far as speculations went, but at this point Uraraka was looking for any reason not to think that she was simply going insane. Not to mention the worry in her stomach grabbing onto any reason it could find to convince her that something was indeed wrong.

"Do you have any idea why?" She asked curiously, cocking her head to the side slightly just as he had done earlier.

"Well, I don't think that it has anything to do with him being uncomfortable or anything. I think that he may be having a premonition." He started, "Dark shadows have a strong sense for negative energy, and he may have picked up on something happening nearby. That was another reason why I didn't want you going out on this walk alone."

That was all the clarification Uraraka needed to conclude her hypothesis. Something was definitely happening; something bad, and something that subconsciously made her want to go check on her parents. This was getting to be way more stressful than she had bargained for, and every step she took made things worse. Almost like she were stepping through a muggy swamp, or towards the remains of a deadly accident. She shuddered as goosebumps appeared on the surface of her skin.

She hadn't wanted to disturb her parents without good reason, but at this point it didn't seem like anything else would have calmed her. She pulled her phone out of her pocked and dialed her parent's speed dial number, placing the speaker next to her ear as it started to ring.

"You have reached the voice messaging system of…"

The phone had gone to voicemail. Considering what time it had been this was to be expected, (who would honestly be awake to answer their phone at close to 4 A.M. at this point?) but something was still rubbing her the wrong way. Something just felt… weird.

Before she knew it she was standing in front of her house, looking as uneventful and dark as every other home in the neighborhood. She felt relieved, but still had an uneasy feeling stuck in the back of her head. She gave a quick knock on the door and rang the doorbell, Fumikage still having a curious look on his face a few paces behind her. Hopefully they wouldn't be too mad about being woken up so ealry. There was the sound of rustling coming from the other side of the door, though she just assumed it had been her parents being somewhat worried over their door being knocked on so early in the morning. Maybe they had been awake, after all.

"I'd feel sorry to be your parents, having such a worrisome daughter checking up on them--"

Before Fumikage could finish a loud crack emerged from the inside of the house, one much too loud to be the careless knocking over of anything. Uraraka's face fell.

"Out of the way!"

Fumikage pushed the stunned Uraraka to the side, extending his leg forward and kicking the door open with all of the strength that he could muster. Uraraka quickly shook her head to regain her composure and entered the now open front door. Her parents would have to chew her out over it some other time.

"Mom! Dad!" she shouted as soon as she had entered the house, turning on her heel and glancing around the whole room before heading for the stairs. Hopefully her parents would have been sleeping soundly in their room and the ominous sound she had just heard had just been a figment of her imagination, though Fumikage's reaction made her doubt that. While Uraraka ran up the stairs, Fumikage turned the other direction to inspect the rest of the house.

Uraraka came to her parent's room and hesitated for only a second, twisting the door knob to see if the room were unlocked. It wasn't. She cursed inwardly, telling herself again that this were another thing her parents would have to complain about later. She gave the door a strong kick after using her quirk to make it lighter.

She was not met with the vision of her parents laying in their bed, she wasn't met with any image at all in fact. A dark shadow loomed in front of her, blocking the view. And before she could comprehend what was going on, a sharp pain erupted in her shoulder. She cried out loudly, taking a step back out of reflex. In this moment's hesitation, the figure pushed her completely to the ground, using her momentum to send her flying over herself.

Whatever it was, it was fast; and Uraraka only caught another second's glimpse of the figure as it disappeared down the stairs. Uraraka gripped the newly discovered wound on her side, one that looked like it had been made with some kind of kitchen knife. She gritted as the pressure she placed onto it sent another wave of discomfort through her body. Using her other hand to push herself to her feet, she shook her head once again to regain her composure.

"Fumikage! He's coming your way!" She shouted a warning but knew that she couldn't go help him yet, there was something she had to check on. She peered once again into her parent's room.

"mom… dad…"

A thick, crimson streak across the back wall and the looks of a struggle met her gaze. The bedside table flipped to its side, the sheets covering her parent's bed completely thrown onto the floor, and the paintings that had at one time hung from the walls now shattered and destroyed. And in the center of the room, two motionless figures holding each other; their arms and legs interlocked at unnatural angles.

"Mom!! Dad!!"

"Uraraka!"

Fumikage's desperate yelp pulled her away from the scene only temporarily, though long enough for her to see the same figure coming towards her yet again, a butcher's knife that she recognized from her kitchen brandished maliciously to his side. Her body hung heavy and her mind ran in a million different directions that she couldn't keep up with, though her reflexes quickly took over. She leapt to the side, narrowly avoiding the tip of the blade that was now aimed at her chest. She winced, the sudden movements agitating the wound she already had.

"To think I had been so careless…"

A dark, ominous tone that sent chills down her spine had reached her ears as she shot her head in the direction it came from. Completely enveloped in the dark cloak that hung from his shoulders, she could only see the dark grin that covered the figure's face. It sent chills down her spine.

"Leaving an unwelcome visitor awake, alive…"

She took a step, but was met with a numbed sensation pulsing through the muscles in her legs. As soon as her foot hit the ground she was brought to a knee, all of a sudden not being able to support her own weight. 'what the…'

"To think you can still move, even if only a bit…" The man spoke in an almost condescending tone, reaffirming his grip on the blade to his side. The smile on his face didn't change.

She let out a grunt of effort as she tried to push herself up to her feet again, only to be overcome with the same numbness that had overtaken her leg now infecting her arms. It was like every muscle she tried to move was working against her, weighing her down in a way that didn't feel unlike one of the power suppressor the heroes would wear anytime they fought against the students.

'Fuck! Fuck!' She grit her teeth in effort and moaned pitifully, 'I have to do SOMETHING!'

The figure took a single step towards her, moving much slower than he had before. He was mocking her, telling her that she was weak and helpless. And that filled her with even more frustration and rage. But even still, her body refused to function.

The man took another step, halving the distance between the two of them. He brought the knife he held to his face, eyeing it curiously.

"A much easier task than what I was expecting, especially considering who it was that gave it to me…" He mused, lightly giggling under his breath almost like a child. "The old age must be getting to him…"

"You…" Uraraka finally spoke up, eyeing him with as aggressive a look as she could muster, "What are you doing here!?"

The man gave out a cackle, one that made his whole body shake. His back arched and he put his hands on his knees to keep himself upright, as if the laugh were enough to make him fall over. "You come here at five in the morning and get taken out as easily as someone who wasn't a star student at U.A., and all you can think to ask is 'What are you doing here'?"

He cackled again, a sound that almost burned her eardrums. She couldn't take this anymore. She had to do something. She didn't know exactly what, but she couldn't just sit there defenseless, no matter how much her body protested.

With a grunt of effort she let the arm she had been using to put pressure on her wound fall to the ground. With her palm placed flatly onto the carpet, she focused all she could into pushing her finger tips into the fabric.

"Ow! Fucking cramps"

As she activated her quirk, this was the last thing she could hear the man say before he fell through the newly weakened floor. She had used her quirk to strengthen the gravity of the floor they stood on, and his body weight had been enough to break through it. And with the man plummeting to the first story, she felt the weight on her body begin to lighten. As soon as she was able to, she made a mad dash towards the stairs.

"Fumikage!"

Upon seeing his figure lying limply on the floor, she quickly ran to his side and checked his vitals as well as she knew how. He was still breathing, albeit weakly. But that was enough for her, she didn't have enough time to worry about what state he was in, only that he was alive. She turned to the dark shadow that still found itself wrapped around his body.

"Dark shadow! Please, I need your help--"

"I cannot." He cut her off mid sentence, "My life force is the only thing keeping him alive. If I were to stray too far…"

It was then that she finally noticed the countless wounds covering the boy's body, some being seemingly caused by the knife the figure carried and others being dark bruises that almost looked infected. She flinched reflexively, taken aback by the state the boy was in.

She wanted to grab him and run while she had the chance, but the image she had seen in her parents' room made her apprehensive. They were still up there, and as bad as Fumikage looked there was no telling what state they had been in. He had a powerful quirk to help him and still ended up like this, her parents were as defenseless as they came. With no way to fight back, there was no telling how they were doing. She was wracking her brain for some kind of plan, but nothing was coming to her. But she couldn't just sit there patiently waiting for the man from before to waltz back into the room and finish the both of them off.

She pulled her cell phone out of her back pocket. By now everyone would have been awake, but there was no telling how they were going to survive until anybody got there. The school was at least twenty minutes from her house, and she didn't know how either her or Fumikage were going to last more than five with this guy. Still, she sent a text to the group chat of her classmates.

"Me and Fumikage need help! Come to my house! He's hurt bad!"

Just as she had pressed the send button, a sharp pain erupted in her finger and the phone was sent flying across the room along with a familiar looking butcher knife. A tsk from the other side of the room caught her attention.

"To think I went to all this trouble just to have my quirk discovered and backup called for. Maybe I underestimated you." The man leisurely came down the stairs with his hand sliding down the railing, like this were his own house.

Uraraka had no idea what he was talking about when he said that she had discovered his quirk, but if it gave her any type of advantage she had to go along with it as best she could. If he thought she knew about his tricks, maybe he would try something else that would make things easier to handle.

"But then again, I think anyone would have done the same. After all, your parents were so weak… who would have thought they could have made such an interesting child."

Her parents… 'were' so weak?

She leapt from Fumikage's side with a blood curdling scream that she could feel tearing away at the sides of her throat, but she couldn't bring herself to care too much. A hazy red hue had enveloped her vision and the only thought focused in her head was one of hatred, one that she hadn't felt many times before. Right before she had the chance to swing her arm aggressively towards him, she once again felt her body being forced to the ground. Before she knew it, she was once again incapacitated and unable to move her body.

"Maybe I was wrong about you," The grin on his face remained constant, and at this point that in itself was enough to make the blood in Uraraka's veins boil. "maybe you really do have no idea what my quirk is. If you did, you wouldn't have rushed towards me so recklessly."

She wracked her brain, trying her hardest to decipher what was going on. Was this the same as the infamous Stain's quirk, one that made her unable to move if he were to get a taste of her blood? Probably not, she definitely would have noticed if the maniacal figure went the extra step in crazy and lapped up her blood like a dog. Was it some sort of variation of her gravity quirk, one that allowed him to make the gravity around her ten times heavier than it really was?

"It's a quirk I affectionately call 'Body Extention'." He spoke to her as he took a step forward, looming ominously over top of her weakened form. "Anything that comes within a certain distance to my body becomes a muscle, something that I can control as if it were my own arms or legs."

From the other side of the room, she could hear metal scraping against the wall, and soon enough the knife that he had thrown came soaring back into his open palm. "The distance at which I can move things may not be as large as I'd like it to be, but I haven't run into any problems yet."

So right at this moment, had she just been another extension of this guy's body? That would explain why she couldn't move no matter the amount of effort she put into it. Right now she was just another limb of this man, one that he was forcibly keeping rested at his side. She grit her teeth, as this was as much movement as she could muster.

He brought the knife to her face, letting her watch as the crimson stains containing her and Fumikage's blood melded together in a sickening display that dripped onto the floor. He ran it lightly across her face, toying with her by leaving a cut no worse than a paper cut. It may not have been a deep wound, but it was enough to send a chill down her spine as she felt her own blood trickling down her face.

"But I like you, you're cute as a button. Maybe a couple more scars could make you that much more desirable." The grin was still there, still a thorn in her side. "Other than the one I have already given you, of course…"

As he said this he motioned downward with the knife he held firmly, towards her left hand that laid weakly on the ground. She looked down herself, a lump forming in her throat at what she saw. If she had any control of her body at that moment, she would have surely vomited.

Her pointer finger was… gone. Cut from the rest of her hand like a weed from a flower bed, and presumably lying on the other side of the room alongside her phone. A puddle of blood had begun to form, staining the carpet in a way she knew would be impossible to clean.

She gagged, her stomach having enough strength to send a thick coat of bile to envelope the inside of her mouth. The taste made her even more sick, and she wished more than anything for the power to spit it out. But that power was something she no longer held, so it simply sat in her mouth; adding a horrible taste to the surge of pain that slowly began developing now that her adrenaline was starting to run out. Her finger was finally starting to hurt. Bad.

A mix of pain and sadness overcame her, an uncertainty as to how she could possibly make it out of this situation. An uncertainty as to what this man was planning to do to her. An uncertainty as to the state that Fumikage had been, and whether or not she should have taken her opportunity to run away with him. An uncertainty as to the state her parents were in upstairs. She wanted nothing more than to hide these feelings from the man in front of her and at the very least feign a confidence that might buy her a few more seconds; but she could no longer help the bitter tears that started to run down her face, mixing with the blood and sweat as it went.

"Aw, how sad a sight to see." He put the knife under her chin, using it to force her gaze to face him. "What pain I must have caused yet again."

This was the first glance she got at his face, no longer shrouded in the shadows of the cloak that he wore. He was an older man, looking to be about thirty or forty years old. His skin looked rough, like it would have the sensation of sand paper, and his thin lips gave his threatening grin that much more impact. His eyes were a dark brown, leaving a lasting dark vibe in Uraraka's soul when she looked into them. He looked straight out of a superhero movie, like some kind of super villain.

"Remember this face…" He brought the blade over his head.

"It will be the last one you see!"

There was a crash to their left, one that made the man audibly flinch. He turned his head, but by the time he saw what had been happening it was already too late. Met by a clenched fist covered by a green jumpsuit, he was sent flying in the opposite direction.

"Are you okay, Uraraka?" Izuku remained in a battle stance, almost instantaneously noticing the state she was in. "Your finger!"

"Get back!" Finally able to move again, Uraraka quickly sprung to action. Nearly tackling Izuku, she ran backwards in an attempt to escape the area that the man could control them in. She leapt through the hole that Izuku had made in the side of the house, getting as far as possible until Uraraka felt they had gone far enough.

"What a punch." The man remained grinning in spite of the trickle of blood that ran down his cheek. He used his open hand to wipe the liquid, leaving a streak behind that made his features that much more menacing.

"I wasn't very far away when I get your text. You're lucky I got up early to train this morning." Finally getting out of the hold that Uraraka had on him, one that the worry over the morning's events had made her put too much strength into, he stepped back into his battle stance. "So what's the deal with this guy?"

"Don't get too close to him, if you get close enough he can control you and keep you from moving." Uraraka warned, using one hand to cover the still aching wound on her side and the other to cover the aching wound on the first hand where her pointer finger used to be.

But Fumikage is still in there, and he looks worse off that you. And that's really saying something…" He got a quick glance at Uraraka as he said this, worry overtaking him.

"You do not need to worry." The man shook his hand dismissively, letting the knife fall to the ground at his side, "I finished what I came here to do before any of you all showed up. I have no qualm with any of you, or the rest of your backup that will surely arrive soon."

"What are you doing here?!" Izuku spat, his muscles tensing.

"That question again?" The hooded figure laughed, "You all really are cut from the same cloth."

Before either of them could react, the hooded figure quickly turned away from the two children. The couch in the living room seemed to levitate as it went flying towards the same wall the man was facing towards, creating a hole just large enough for him to fit through. Before taking a step, the man turned towards the two children again.

"Hopefully we do not see each other again."

And with that, he was gone as suddenly as he had appeared. It almost felt too good to be true, though Izuku still let his guard down somewhat. He turned to Uraraka "Let's hurry up and get out of-- Uraraka!"

He had turned just in time to see all of the complex emotions jumbled inside of her chest overtake her, leaving her helplessly lying on the ground. The mix of anger, frustration, sadness, and pain finally took hold of her mind as she slipped into an unconscious state.


	2. Faux Strength

Trials and Tribulations

HankFlamion18 - I can't tell if that's a good thing or not, but I think it's good so thank you xD

AnimeAddicts7 - lot's of expletives getting thrown around in the reviews for the first chapter huh xp but still, thank u for the kind words

It's chapter 2 now yay, lets see if I can keep this momentum up. I've always had problems sticking with a story idea after the first chapter, but hopefully this can mark a change in that. Make sure to review or favorite or anything else, cause that definitely helps inspire me to keep going!

Anyway, enough with me talking. Back to the story -

X

She awoke the same as she had the day before, a dark pulsing in the pit of her stomach making her want to emit a discomforted moan. But this time the feeling seemed somewhat artificial, for lack of a better word; like something had actually been put inside of her stomach, something that made her feel significantly worse than usual. She wasn't sure what it was, but she knew that she hated this feeling it caused.

She was surely awake, yet for some reason wasn't able to bring herself to open her eyes. It were as if a weight were forcing her eyelids shut, a weight she had been much too weak to argue with. Now that she was aware of herself, she was coming to realize that this weight forced itself around her entire body. She couldn't move, open her eyes, or make any kind of sound. It was starting to get annoying how often it seemed that she couldn't control her body lately. If she were able, she definitely would have groaned in discomfort right about now.

"Shes been asleep now for over 24 hours, is there truly nothing more that we could do for her?" A voice that she quickly recognized as Eraser Head reached her ears, though she couldn't respond. It made her wonder where she was, and more specifically what he was doing there.

"I've done all I can. Even after exhausting all of the help my quirk could give, I still have to administer an I.V." another voice rang out, this one she recognized as Recovery Girl. She guessed that meant that she was in the nurse's office, though she couldn't quite remember why. A memory that she knew existed, but seemed so far away.

"Is she going to be okay?" Izuku's voice rang out, sounding distressed. His being there gave her great relief, but she wasn't sure why.

"For the millionth time, yes." Recovery Girl sounded exasperated, and Uraraka could imagine the exhausted look that was on her face. She had to empathize with the nurse; Izuku was sometimes a bit too enthusiastic when it came to the well being of his friends. Not that this was a bad thing. "She's just fatigued, almost to an unnatural degree. Like the muscles in the legs of someone who just spent three hours squatting a couple hundred pounds. But the fatigue is the only lingering issue I can see, so that's a good sign"

This gave her another surge of relief, knowing that these feelings that she felt were only temporary. Or at least some of them. This weighted surge would presumably come to pass whenever the liquid dripping into her veins from the I.V. had run out, and her fatigue would probably do the same after a few more hours rest/ A certain pang in her chest seemed different for whatever reason though. Like it had festered into her soul and created a home for itself, one that she would have a hard time removing. But she couldn't be certain about anything, especially considering that she couldn't even move a finger at this point.

Having received all the information that she thought she needed from the exchange that she was eavesdropping on, she settled her mind again to go back to sleep. She was extremely tired, after all, and hopefully some rest would make her feel better. But just before she slipped into an unconscious state once again, she heard one last mutter that would have worried her had she been attentive enough to truly comprehend it.

"I hope her hand is going to be okay, that thing is starting to look pretty crazy…"

She awoke again what felt like a couple hours later, this time to a much more eager response from her body. Although still a pain, she was able to open her eyes after a few seconds of struggle. She didn't dare move any other part of her body though, fearing how it would react to being woken up so abruptly. She let out a tired yawn without realizing it as she attempted to examine the state she was in.

"Ah, she finally awakes!" Uraraka lifted her head slightly to much protest from her muscles, but still managed to catch a glimpse of a smiling Nurse Girl. As soon as her head had been lifted though, it came crashing back down onto the pillow beneath her with a thud. The sudden movements made her yelp helplessly. Recovery Girl gave a small laugh and put a reassuring hand on Uraraka's arm. "Give me one second and I can help with all that."

She felt the sharp pain, almost like a bug bite, as her I.V. was pulled out of her arm. She then felt a moist sensation on her palm followed by the sound of an intense, moist kiss. She would always blush whenever Recovery Girl would use her quirk on her, and she blamed it on her almost childlike innocence. Not that anyone else could call her 'childlike' and get away with it.

Within seconds she could feel the strength coming back to her body as her blood ran through her veins at what felt like doubled the pace that it normally had. It sent a chill down her spine, like a surge of warm water being spilt on her without warning. Before she knew it she had been pushing herself up to a sitting position, using the pillow to support her still sore back muscles. She ran her fingers though her hair and was disgusted for a second over how greasy it felt.

"twenty-six hours of sleep sure was a lot, far surpassing my initial estimate." Recovery Girl wrote something down on the piece of paper on her desk, presumably Ururaka's medical chart. "you sure must have been tired."

"I guess so…" She responded sheepishly, her brain still foggy as to the details of what had happened before she passed out. But it wasn't her fatigue that blocked her brain, she felt like it was almost as if her brain didn't _want_ her to remember something. She was hard pressed to find a reason to argue with it.

"With that though, you should be able to move around again." Recovery Girl placed the pencil down on her desk and turned to Uraraka, "Class is still going on right now, but I wouldn't hold it against you if you wanted to take today and the rest of the weekend off."

She wasn't sure exactly what Recovery Girl meant when she said that she 'wouldn't blame her', but she still knew that missing class was something that she couldn't let happen. She already missed a day and a half of classes if her internal clock was still correct, and that was enough to get her behind. Three consecutive absences would be hard to recover from.

"It's alright, I think I'd better go to class." She decided, stretching out her tired limbs. She ran her hand through her hair again and tried to settle the intense bed head that she had accumulated, but it was to no avail. She would have to shower before going to class again, twenty eight hours was way too long for her to go without a shower after all. It made her feel icky.

But when she ran her hand through her hair that second time, something felt _different._ She couldn't place her finger on it, but something was definitely off. She started with her pinky finger, rubbing the spot in her hair where it rested. All good there.

She went on to her ring finger, and eventually tested every finger on her left hand. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary there. There was some resistance when she finally tried moving her pointer finger, but maybe that was just the fatigue finally starting to ware off. She let the hand fall in front of her eyes.

 _Her finger didn't just feel weird. It was… gone._

She stifled a scream, but couldn't stop a pathetic groans from escaping her lips. This had to be her mind playing tricks on her, this had to be some kind of mistake, this had to be something….

"Are you sure you don't want to take the rest of the day off?" Recovery Girl spoke out somewhat awkwardly, as if she she weren't sure exactly how to approach the topic. But the fact that the nurse had said anything at all meant at least one thing; this wasn't her mind playing tricks on her.

Uraraka herself wasn't sure how to respond next, her gaze transfixed on the medical wrap that the area surrounding her finger was wrapped in. She was at a loss for words, and it didn't help that her mind felt like it was keeping something from her. Something that she almost felt like she didn't want to remember.

"There will be some complications surrounding… _that_ … that we may have to address." Recovery Girl turned away again and looked down at the medical sheet on her desk, leaving Uraraka with a stunned look on her face.

"Unfortunately, we were unable to put the finger back on the hand. It had been removed in a very…" she hesitated, picking her next words carefully, " _messy_ way. This significantly impacts the use of your quirk."

It was then that Uraraka tore her gaze from her missing finger long enough to notice that the rest of her fingers on her left hand were missing something as well. The pads on the tips of her fingers were gone, and the newly exposed skin where they used to be were instead covered in band aids decorated with small illustrations of Shiba dogs. Uraraka would have thought this cute in any other sense, but at the moment she was too overcome to react.

"With one of your fingers missing, we've seen in previous students that a quirk such as yours could go completely out of whack." Recovery Girl continued, Uraraka barely keeping up with what she was saying. "We have managed to combat this in a way that may seem uncomfortable, but is for the best."

"Think of it like a car with four wheel drive. If the front right tire were to pop, the car would go completely out of control and you wouldn't be able to steer it," She continued, "In an ideal world we would just change the tire, but we've tried that and it hasn't worked, unfortunately. So, if you didn't have any other option, the next best plan of action would be to move the front left tire to the middle of the car so that it would still be driveable, albeit a lot more dangerous."

Uraraka still couldn't bring herself to take her eyes off of the image in front of her, much less respond to what Recovery Girl was telling her. The phrase "I would know it like the back of my hand" came to her mind at this moment, because it no longer rang true for her. She no longer knew what the back of her hand looked like. This _thing_ in front of her no longer looked or felt like it belonged to her.

"To put it simply," Recovery Girl turned towards Uraraka again with a look of concern, "Your quirk would have been unmanageable if we had left things how they were. You would have been an out of control car. So we removed the damaged side, though in your case that results in you only being able to use your quirk on your left side. Needless to say, this also makes the quirk much less potent than it was previously."

Once again, Uraraka couldn't bring herself to speak. She tried, but it only resulted in her mouth being stuck agape.

"Are you sure you don't want to skip the rest of class for the day?" Recovery Girl asked again, "nobody would blame you."

Uraraka finally shook her head determinedly, forcing herself out of the trance she had been stuck in. Forcing her gaze away from her hand and towards Recovery Girl turned out to be a harder task than expected.

"If my quirk is going to be weaker now, that's even more reason I should get to class and work on it…" She feigned a sense of confidence, but it was easily seen through considering the tone she spoke in. It was barely audible, and full of countless voice cracks. Recovery Girl sighed.

"If you insist…" Recovery Girl gave in apprehensively, "Though I implore you to shower in your dorm before doing that. You've been asleep for a long time, after all."

Uraraka nodded at this, instinctively trying to push herself off the bed. But her damaged hand sent a wave of pain in protest, so she adjusted her legs and leapt out of the bed instead in a single, quick movement. She gave Recovery Girl one last thank you as she left, but couldn't ignore the concerned look she saw her having as she stepped through the door. Although appreciated, Recovery Girl's worry brought about more questions than comfort. The nurse must have surely dealt with worse injuries than this in her time, All Might's situation being the example that first came to her mind. His injuries and the resulting damage to his quirk were much more significant than hers. And besides that, she didn't necessarily take Nurse Girl as the empathetic type. The seemed more like a power through it or you are simply too weak' kind of person. There had to be something more to it, but now wasn't the time to dwell on it.

When she entered her dorm, she saw that her phone had been left on her bed, though she distinctly remembered putting it in her pocket the last time she had exited the room. Curious, she handled the device with her one good hand, unlocking it with only little trouble. It had been over a day, so her parents would have surely been worried about her not responding to their usual morning texts. As soon as the home screen appeared, she was met instead by a flurry of messages from all kinds of classmates. Those in her class, ones from those in class 1-B; even a few messages from students outside of UA entirely had found their way into her phone. Although mostly familiar names popped up, there were quite a few numbers that she had completely forgotten to create contacts for.

'Keep up the hard work, we are all depending on you ^.^'

'Get back to class soon, slowpoke! Don't want to fall too far behind ;-p'

'Not that I care or anything, but I hope you're feeling not bad.'

That last one was from Bakugo, obviously, but the sentiment still made her smile. One day away from class and she already got this many messages from worried comrades, this was the perfect pick me up after an extremely stressful morning. She made a point to send everyone who sent a message a reply, but most of them got the same text from her.

"I'm doing fine! :-) Definitely gonna head back to class today. Thanks for checking in!"

Having sent all the messages she needed to, she sat down on her bed for a moment. She was still confused as to why she didn't get the usual 'good morning' message from her father, but she was in too much a rush to let it bother her. She quickly stripped off the unbearably sweaty and smelly workout clothes that had been sticking uncomfortably to her oily skin before stepping into the bathroom.

Once the temperature was at a comfortable temperature, she stepped into the shower and immediately wettened the rats nest that currently was the hair atop her head. She ran her hands though the strands, forcing through any tangles that had forcibly stuck themselves together. She stood for a moment, using this time to reflect on what exactly had happened thus far in the day.

So her quirk was now significantly weaker, and she could only activate it with her left hand, huh…. That may be a problem for a little while, but Uraraka was thankful at least that her quirk could be saved at all. Without a quirk, there was no way she would stand a chance in the U.A. program, especially not the top class that she somehow found herself in. That fact still surprised her sometimes.

She looked once again at her now damaged beyond repair hand, wincing slightly as the water dripped onto her fresh wounds. It was something that she would have to get used to, but she had to look on the bright side. At least she still _had_ a hand.

She must have been looking at her hand again for longer than she thought, as the water dripping onto her fingertips eventually made the band aid that covered one of them begin to fall off. She winced once again as the water now irritated the newly exposed reddened skin, but she did her best to brush it off. She stuck the band aid back onto her finger as best it was able, inwardly reminding herself to replace the band aid with the ones he had in her drawer after she was done with the shower. They were pug band aids, but that was close enough to the shiba's that were stuck to the other fingers. She took her worry about something as trivial as band aids matching as a good sign as far as her mental health went.

She washed the grime and sweat from her body as quick as she could, stepping out of the shower afterwards and putting on her usual school uniform after drying herself off. She examined her reflection in the mirror, ensuring that everything was in its right place and looked as sharp as ever. She gave herself a quick nod after brushing her hair, happy with how she looked. An extra couple seconds spent on your outfit really did go a long way.

She may not have felt anywhere close to okay, but she was pretty good at pretending. The thought came from out of nowhere.

She lifted the backpack from the floor of her bed and started out the door, locking it as she left. She knew that nobody would try to break in or steal anything, but any defense against Minoru somehow getting a hold of a pair of her underwear was a defence she planned on taking advantage of. She exited her dorm and made her way to the classroom as quickly as she could, having checked the clock to see that third period was ending. If she hurried, she wouldn't miss any of fourth period. And fourth period was always the most fun anyway, since it was when they got to use their quirks.

She waited outside of her fourth period classroom, waiting patiently for third period to end. She had gotten there with a few minutes to spare, so she took the opportunity to review the notes she had taken last class. She was already a full day behind, so she needed to be as prepared as possible.

'Izuku came to talk to me before we started, he looked as confident as ever…'

Now that she was actually reading back her notes, she was starting to see that they seemed more like a diary than anything else. She skimmed through the useless comments she had the bad habit of writing down to focus on the important stuff.

'Using my quirk on everyone isn't as hard anymore, and it really helps to get everyone off the ground whenever someone uses a quirk to mess with it, like making an earthquake or something. If I put all my finger tips together I can focus really hard on changing their gravity, and now it actually works pretty reliably!'

With her new found injury, she knew that most likely none of this was the case anymore. She assumed that her quirk's power had been at least halved given that half of the fingertips that regulated her powers were gone, and without being able to put her fingertips together any longer to remotely activate her quirk, she would presumably be lucky to get even one person off of the ground. Maybe she could come up with some work around this, but at the moment she couldn't rely on anything she hadn't tested.

As this thought crossed her mind, she heard the bell signaling the end of third period ring out to her side. She shoved the notebook back into her backpack, patiently waiting for the previous class to file out of the classroom before entering and making her way for her desk. She gave Eraser Head a pleasant wave as she passed him at the front of the classroom. He gave only a half-hearted smile in return.

"While I'm happy you're here…" Eraser Head started as the rest of the class began entering the room, lingering in the hallways to converse their friends or make out with their significant others. Seeing the latter always made her uncomfortable, and it didn't help that it was much more common than one would think. "I could have sworn that you were going to take at least a couple days off from class."

Even Eraser Head, the most strict teacher in the whole school, was telling her to take a few days off? This didn't make any sense. There were plenty of students that still returned to their lectures immediately following injuries, even if she couldn't think of any examples as significant as her own off the top of her head. Maybe it was just her usual bubbly, cheerful nature that made them worry about her more so than any other random student. The favoritism was appreciated, but she still felt guilty about it.

"No, it's fine, I promise." She waved her hand in front of her face dismissively, "I can't get even more behind than I already am. I already missed yesterday. One day off is enough."

The sour look didn't leave Eraser Head, but he reluctantly backed down. He turned away from Uraraka and began writing the day's lesson on the board, but addressed her one last time. "Even if you want to be here, I'm not too sure if that's the best for you."

This comment once again confused Uraraka, but she didn't have too long to ponder it or respond as she saw a trio of familiar faces entering the room.

"Uraraka!" Izuku nearly sprinted to her desk, embracing her into a tight hug that sent chills along the wound she had still been fostering at her side. Izuku apologized profusely upon seeing the pained expression on Uraraka's face, but she just smiled in return nonetheless. She was always happy to see the energetic boy, even if he was a bit overenthusiastic. A few paces behind him, Tenya and Shoto also walked over to her desk. Neither one was as enthusiastic as Izuku had been, but they were still clearly happy to see her.

"Hey guys!" She waved to the two students, who returned the gesture.

"Surprised to see you up and at em' so quickly, especially for how long you were out." Tenya commented, his gaze lingering on the bandages surrounding her hand. "I like the pugs."

"Thank you! I think that they are so cute!" She responded happily, but hoped that not everyone would be so obvious about their interest in her injuries. At least the gash in her side was covered by her clothes, she thought to herself.

"Yea… especially with how close you were to them, you em-" Before Shoto could finish what he was saying, he was cut off by Tenya's elbow being jabbed into his side. What exactly was Shoto getting at? Before she could ask, Eraser Head called out loudly from the front of the room.

"Alright everyone, class is starting so pay attention."

A few stragglers from the hallway came into the room following the announcement, but for the most part everyone had settled into their desks and given Eraser Head their full attention. Most of the kids had either been focusing on Eraser Head or done their best to hide their interest in her, but Uraraka couldn't help noticing the burning gazes that sunk into the back of her head. She wished they would stop, it was getting in the way of the lesson.

"Before we start on the lesson, let's review everyone's performances yesterday. Starting with Shoto, you were a bit quick to engage your quirk and that made everyone else suffer in having to avoid the huge obstacle you made…"

She wasn't even in class the previous day, so she couldn't really take anything away from the performance reviews of her peers. She tried her best to pay attention, but it was hard without having any kind of context to go off of. When she felt her phone vibrate, it was almost impossible to stop herself from checking the message she had received almost immediately.

'you're in class already? Are you sure you're okay? I know you well enough to know when something is off…'

It was from Tsuyu, probably her best friend in the class. She looked over to where she sat a few desks down from her and saw her doing the same. Uraraka offered the frog girl a meek, apologetic smile, remembering she had not greeted her at the start of class. She looked down at her phone after this and typed up a response.

'What do you mean? Yea the injustice sucks but it's nothing insane or anything'

She typed this out, half trying to convince herself that she believed what she wrote.

'Is that all you remember from yesterday? The injury? Do you even know how you got it?'

Tsuyu seemed to be a lot more questioning than usual, but Uraraka nonetheless pondered them. Now that she thought about it, she really didn't remember anything from the past couple days. She wondered why that was. She remembered running into Fumikage in the common area, but…

'Not really. Do you know where Fumikage is? He doesn't usually miss class. I'll copy down notes for him if he needs it.'

Tsuyu looked over at her from the other side of the classroom with a bewildered look on her face, but Uraraka could only shrug in response. She really didn't know what all the fuss was about.

'He's still hurt pretty bad. Do you really not remember _anything_ about what happened?'

Uraraka couldn't help but be brought back to the sensation that she had felt earlier, the sensation warning her of her thoughts purposely hiding something from her. Something that was better off not being remembered, something that she didn't _want_ to remember. Now that she was thinking about it though, she did vaguely remember Fumikage being hurt, though she couldn't quite recall what happened specifically. An image of his battered and bruised body lying on the floor in her living room came to mind, but she quickly shook it away. What was Fumikage doing at her house?

'not really, no…'

'I think you'd better leave. I think you need a couple more visits with Recovery Girl.'

Tsuyu's response gave her a bad feeling, and the sudden migraine she felt only exacerbated that. Tsuyu was so upfront about things, it really made her head hurt thinking about it. And all of a sudden things were starting to force their way into the front of her thoughts, things she didn't want to see.

The face of a cloaked man, a crimson streak spread across his face below a maniacal grin. Fumikage, looking like someone had gone to town on his unconscious body with a kitchen knife, his dark shadow wrapped protectively around him. Her parents…

 _Her parents…!_

Uraraka raised her hand high, her voice speaking out before Eraser Head could acknowledge her. "I need to go to the nurse's office!"

By the time Eraser Head gave her the okay, she was already halfway out of her desk and heading for the door. She felt the gazes of the other classmates resting on her once again, and she hated it. Though this time the annoyance was fueled by something else, something more… _bitter_.

She let the door slam behind her and realized she forgot her backpack in the classroom, but at the moment she couldn't have cared less. All of these different thoughts flooding her mind, she hoped and wished that they would be nothing more than some kind of delusion. At this point she didn't care if she was going crazy, as long as these things she was seeing were just the crazy ramblings of an unfit mind. That seemed like wishful thinking.

She took a few steps forward, but jerked reflexively to the sound of the door behind her being opened again. For some reason, she found herself almost terrified when she saw Shoto holding her backpack.

"You forgot this." He started, carefully walking towards her. The look that she had been giving him was that of pure terror, that much she could tell. Or at least she thought she could. There was just too much to handle. "Are… are you okay, Uraraka?"

Shoto tried to hand the backpack to the girl, but recoiled in shock seeing how she responded. She aggressively and pathetically flinched at the boy's movements, as if afraid that he were going to hit her or cause some other kind of damage. Shoto was taken aback. He had never seen Uraraka like this before.

"Let's go to Recovery Girl right away…" He tried to place a reassuring hand on her shoulder, but his touch burned like the tip of a cigarette being put out on her bare skin. She called out, no longer in control of the volume of her voice, and quickly jumped back. She put her palm on her shoulder as if feeling for some kind of wound, but that only proved to put the damaged hand back into her view and remind her of the damage. She screamed.

Before Shoto could respond she turned and ran as fast as her legs could carry her. This was already too much, too much for her brain to comprehend. And her pathetic cry must have surely been heard from within the classroom, and she didn't want to imagine what it would be like if someone else came to check on her. She was already having sensory overload. She needed to be alone.

She fell to her knees whenever she felt like she had gotten far enough away from the classroom. She stared at the foreign object that was now her own hand, but this time with a gaze that held different thoughts. It was no longer just an obstacle for her to overcome; it was now a stubborn, constant reminder of the things that were driving her world view insane and her thoughts in circles. A constant reminder of these images she was too weak to comprehend. She wanted to sink through the floor, to completely erase herself from this world. She wanted solitude, she wanted her brain to shut the _fuck up._

She pulled her phone out of her pocket and ignored the messages that Tsuyu had sent, quickly unlocking it and dialing the number for her parents that she had etched into her memory. She didn't bother using her speed dial.

"You have reached the voice message system of…"

The next thing she knew she was on her feet, running as fast as she could as bitter tears once again began running down her face. This in itself sent more bad memories rummaging through her mind.

She cried out pitifully as she sobbed, no longer caring about the classrooms she was surely disturbing.


	3. Fall Rise

Trials and Tribulations

I'm starting on chapter three, it's a miracle! Its only been four days I think since I first started on the first chapter, so I'm honestly pretty proud of the progress I'm making. Here's to hoping that I can keep it up even after my school starts back up on Monday!

Fun fact, I'm writing this immediately after watching Jin-Roh. My soul is currently dead. That movie killed it.

Fair warning - this chapter is where it gets super dark. Tbh the story gets a lot more dark from this point forward before it gets any lighter. So yea. CW for this chapter and the rest of the story that it may include topics such as self harm, suicidal thoughts, and other things involving depression and mental illness. You have been warned.

HankFlamion18 - Hm, not sure what you might mean. I kinda improv when it comes to starting and stopping chapters, but since they all flow into each other I figure it isn't a big deal.

Typoking7 - Soon, my friend :)

Anyway, here's chapter three-

X

She was still panting and sweating as she bundled herself tightly in the silk sheets atop her dorm's bed, covering her mouth and face to stifle the pants and screams that endlessly escaped her lips. Her throat was sore, tired from the strenuous use, but the pain didn't prove enough to silence her. Her eyes had been forced shut since she first entered the dorm, and this for some reason had helped slightly to relieved the anxious thoughts that had overtaken her usual lightheartedness. She felt alone, disappearing in the best of ways. The world was turning it's back on her, finally repaying itself for all of the frequent instances of luck that she had received over the years. The manifestation of her quirk, her being accepted into U.A.'s top class, all of the lovely friends and acquaintances that filled her days with boundless joy; the universe was finally deciding to equalize all the good in her life by supplying the bad. And it was starting to feel like she had gotten the bad end of the deal.

She would have gladly given everything up at that exact moment, thrown everything she had accumulated over the past 15 years of her life just to make the unease in her soul cease. She would have gladly taken it all back, undone every significant connection that she had made with all of her classmates just for a glimpse, a taste of the happiness she used to have that seemed so far away now. The happiness that was now buried under a thick, heavy blanket of self doubt and hate.

The man from her house, the one that she had fought during her exit. Why was he there? Her harmless parents, knowing nothing of the hero world aside from the fact that their daughter had been a part of it, what did they do to deserve anything that they got? What did they do to lose the right to their life? What made someone think that they had the right to take it away from them? Uraraka hugged herself tightly, the fingernails on her undamaged hand digging uncomfortably into her skin until they drew blood. This sensation almost felt… relieving? For the first time since this panic attack had first started she was able to control herself, although the desires she held and her overall mind in general were far from a state that they should be controlling anything in.

She remembered the man saying something about being sent to her parent's house right before he left, what could he have possibly been sent to accomplish? Did killing her parents bring any positive benefits to any organization of villains that may have targeted her? Did they get the result that they wanted? Was her mental distress what they had wanted? Did they just want to destroy the mental health of a future hero to get further along in their goal? Was this… her fault?

It wasn't very sound logic, but it was the only question that she managed to answer in the sea of uncertainties that swam around inside her subconsciousness. And even though she couldn't think of any proof to her guilt aside from the loose justifications that she hypothesized, she couldn't find definitive proof of her innocence either. And so she assumed this meant that there was no evidence of her innocence, because she wasn't innocent. She was the bad guy. She was the problem. She was the reason her parents were dead.

Her body shook uncontrollably, and her fingers dug deeper and deeper into her skin until even her fingers covered in band aids started making damage. Bruises, cuts, they all felt like nothing but scratches to her. And for some reason this lackluster response bothered her… a lot.

Her phone lying on the bed right outside the cocoon that she had built for herself, she felt as soon as a strong vibration signaled the incoming of a message. She ignored it. She couldn't face anyone how she currently was, she didn't want to burden anyone else with the state she was in. And to her, the self awareness was enough evidence to show that thing's weren't as bad as they seemed. She would be back to normal in no time!

She was hard pressed in convincing even herself of that.

A wicked smile appeared on her face, one that felt simply… _wrong._ How could she show any sign of happiness right now, how could she think she could fool herself with the facade of normality when the tears continued to stream down her face and her body continued to shake?

And yet she finally allowed herself to lay down, finally allowed her face to exit the prison it had created for itself and once again bear witness to the walls of her bedroom. It wasn't much, but it was something. But for some reason, this felt as equally a step backward as it did forward. This way that she was feeling was so confusing, it was hard to keep tabs on anything anymore.

She squirmed her limbs, rubbing every inch of her skin on the softness that was her bed underneath her. She allowed her nerves to go numb from the strange sensations, their movements turning into more of a reflex than a conscious choice. She giggled silently to herself at the strange feelings in her tireless limbs, almost like a child at the playground.

Without warning, her damaged hand came flying towards her forehead; and without anything to stop it, the impact it made was ruthless and strong. It may have not been balled into a fist, but it had still been enough of an impact to leave a bruise. Or at least the thumping in her face told her that there was a bruise.

But that's all it was, a dull thumping that made her ears pop. There was no distinct pain, no distinct displeasure, only a quick. Dull. Thumping. But the lack of blindingly powerful sensations of pain from her nerves brought about no relief, only an unease that was hard pressed to become anything more significant.

Was this some kind of manic episode; some kind of unconscious movement that she was having no control over, even if it felt like she did? She had no experience with anything even remotely close to this, everything so far was completely new to her. She may have speculated that it was some kind of mental health issue, but even that was nothing more than a speculation. She had no idea what the problem was, or who she could turn to that could help. Not that she wanted to turn to anyone, necessarily. There may have been a million different sensations running through her veins, but there was one that seemed to stick out. Vulnerability.

She was somehow… ashamed of how she saw herself. But at the same time, a strong sensation of curiosity also wanted to climb up onto the roof and screech loud enough for all to hear. Two strong opposites that still fit together like a puzzle, branching off into a million different directions that they could never have reached alone. She felt her phone vibrate again.

But this time, there was almost no hesitation in reaching for it, settling afterwards into her bed and staring up at it happily. Like a child with a toy she pressed all kinds of different buttons, seeing exactly what kind of reaction she could get out of it.

'I'm coming to your room, make sure you're dressed.'

It was Tsuyu again. She had only interacted with her via text so far that day, which was super weird considering Tsuyu's negative opinion of all phones in general. Uraraka gazed down at herself, not noticing until now how all of her disassociated movements riled her clothes up over themselves and across her body, almost exposing herself. She sat up only for a second, pulling the clothes back down to their original spots.

Even in this strange head space, she knew deep down that anyone coming to her room at that moment was most definitely a bad idea, and one she should avoid at all cost. She wanted - NEEDED to be alone. She needed to come to terms with herself, to find out exactly what had been going on. She typed a response.

'I'm fine, promise! Just tired, sleepy. Maybe I woke up in Recovery Girl's office too fast ^.^;'

She pressed send, and Tsuyu responded almost immediately.

'If that's true then you wouldn't mind me coming to check up on you, huh? There shouldn't be anything for you to worry about.'

The emoji she had put at the end of the message of the little emoji man looking to the side and smirking was almost a declaration of victory, like there was nothing left for Uraraka to say that could change her mind. And she did have a point, she had to admit. But there was one this Tsuyu was wrong about, there definitely was something for Uraraka to worry about. She wasn't okay. Tsuyu checking in on her would only make her worry, and that was the last thing she wanted. She didn't want to be bothersome to her friends, a burden that they would have to carry.

'Honestly, I'm not doing alright. I'm feeling things I haven't felt before. I feel broken. I think I need to be alone right now, at least for a little bit.'

All she could think to do at that point was be vulnerable, not hide behind the mask of cheerfulness that she always wore. But this vulnerability made her feel weak, like she had been overtaken by some kind of enemy that she had fought a long and hard battle against. She didn't like showing this side of herself, but at that point there was nothing else she could have thought to do to get Tsuyu off her back.

Uraraka took on the spiritual role of a protector, one that all of her allies could rely on. Although she wasn't physically strong, she couldn't deny that the performance of her friends and classmates increased whenever she was around. She didn't like to toot her own horn, especially since her addition to battles were mostly mental, but they were still present nonetheless. Her cheerfulness gave her allies something to grasp onto in times of effort, and the amount of work that she had to put into keeping her allies safe made them want to stay out of harm's way even more so than they otherwise would have.

Breaking this cheerful act was more than just a showing of vulnerability that made her feel weak, it also had an objective effect on the overall well being of the team. And she was anything if not selfish, so that was enough to inspire the strength that she had to display.

'I could have guessed that you weren't doing alright Uraraka…'

Tsuyu's reply came a moment later, the sound of the phone vibrating puncturing through the otherwise silent room. While she was reading the one text, another one immediately followed.

'But it isn't healthy for you to shut yourself out. You need to learn to rely on people, to lean on your friends. We care about you.'

She gazed at the deep bruises and scratch marks she had inflicted onto her arms, pondering what exactly Tsuyu had meant by the word 'healthy'. The sentiment of the texts rang true and she appreciated the kind words, but now wasn't the time with which Uraraka could stomach hearing about how much she meant to everyone or how they all would do whatever they could for her. It didn't offer her any relief, it just made her feel guilty. Tsuyu's message was no exception.

'Isn't that something I can learn some other time? I really don't think that right now would be good…'

'Nice try, but I'm almost there. We don't have to talk or anything if you don't want to, it would just put my mind at ease if I was with you.'

Uraraka cursed under her breath. Tsuyu had always been rather stubborn so she had already kind of assumed that this is how their argument would end, but she still wasn't happy about it. But, now that she was thinking about it, texting back and forth with the frog girl had distracted her restless mind and given it something to focus on, so maybe her presence there wouldn't be so bad after all.

With that thought fresh in her mind, she was still startled by the sudden knocking on her door. A part of her told her that she should just ignore the knocks and eventually they would stop and Tsuyu would go away, but another part of her knew that Tsuyu wasn't the type to give up easily.

"Hey, the door is unlocked, I'm coming in."

Well, there goes that idea.

Tsuyu opened the door just wide enough to speak clearly into the room, and Uraraka gave a forcibly peppy 'mm-hmm' in response. Tsuyu took this as permission for her to enter the room, closing and locking the door behind her.

By this point Uraraka had sat herself up and was leaning against the back of her bed so that she could face Tsuyu, smiling towards her as the frog girl took a seat at the desk beside the bed. Tsuyu may have said that they didn't have to talk, but the awkwardness that this would have resulted in would have been too much to bear. It was already awkward enough confronting the person that she had been openly vulnerable towards over text not even ten minutes prior, but sitting there in silence and imagining all of the judgemental things that Tsuyu could have been thinking would have only made things worse. But even with that being said, she couldn't bring herself to speak up first. Finally, Tsuyu gave a 'tsk' and pointed towards where Uraraka sat.

"You know you're bleeding, right?"

She looked to the spot where she had felt her fingernails digging into her skin and, sure enough, each fingernail had opened a separate wound for blood to leak from. It wasn't anything crazily graphic, but it wasn't something to ignore either. They definitely looked like they could have gotten infected if just left out in the open.

Tsuyu took a paper towel off of the roll on Uraraka's desk, walking over to her friend and wiping the blood from the arm arm herself. Uraraka couldn't help but recoil under Tsuyu's touch, but her body's reaction wasn't anywhere near as damaging as when Shoto had touched her before. Even the thought of it made her shiver.

The method with which Tsuyu was showing her concern was surprisingly relaxing to Uraraka. She had expected a look on Tsuyu's face that projected her concern and a tone of voice that carefully examined every word before she spoke them. Thankfully, Tsuyu acted the same as always, which was exactly what Uraraka wanted. She didn't want pity or worry, she wanted everything to be the same as always.

Something told her that this was an impossible dream to have. She tried her best to brush it off.

After the blood had been sufficiently cleaned from her arm, Tsuyu dug through her cabinets until she found the first aid box. Grabbing a large band aid, she laid it across all of the wounds. They were relatively close together, so the one bandage worked fine. Uraraka nodded in thanks to her friend.

"Thank you…" Uraraka sounded weak, half because of her having not spoken in at least a half hour, and the other half because of the screaming from earlier still having made her throat extremely sore.

"Don't worry about it." Tsuyu nodded, placing the first aid kit back where she had found it. Uraraka felt somewhat guilty over how often she had been using it lately.

She was glad that Tsuyu hadn't tried to comment on the wounds, just done her part in cleaning them as best she could. She didn't think that it was something that Uraraka felt she could have explained away, and it definitely wasn't something that she wanted to confront head on.

There was a somewhat awkward silence following this, but Tsuyu didn't seem to mind. She occupied the time by checking the social media apps on her phone or exploring the room that she didn't really get the chance to spend too much time inside. Hero training was as tiring as it got, after all, and time spent outside of school was time usually spent sleeping in their own rooms or hanging out in the common area. Uraraka may have called Tsuyu her best friend, but they admittedly didn't spend a lot of time together outside of class or group meet ups. None of the students really spent time with anyone outside of those activities, really.

"I like that poster." Tsuyu stuck her finger towards Uraraka's wall nonchalantly, and Uraraka followed where it was pointed towards.

It was the only thing she had hung on her wall, mostly because she was afraid of getting in trouble for poking too many holes into it. She knew she could get away with at least one, so she picked out her favorite piece to put in the room.

It was something that she herself had made, rather self serving that she displayed it on the wall now that she thought about it. It was something she made in elementary school, and honestly there wasn't much to justify how proud she was of it. It was a canvas wrapped in a fancy frame, one that she had thrown paint at randomly when she was a kid. It was still the first artistic thing that she ever made, so she guessed she could explain her pride with nostalgia.

"That's nothing." Uraraka waved it off, "just something I made as a kid. I didn't know what I was doing."

"Even if you didn't know what it meant, there's still a lot to take away from a painting like that. Have you ever tried to interpret it?" Tsuyu countered. Uraraka shook her head.

"Let's see…" Tsuyu pondered the painting with a speculative eye, here palm under her chin. She traced some of the lines with her fingers, muttering to herself all the while. It was an interesting display, so say the least.

"First of all, the color pallet you chose was relatively dark, which can be interpreted as either a soothing sensation or a general sadness. Two pretty distinctly opposite interpretations, but not really that far off when you really think about it." Uraraka was confused, not sure exactly what Tsuyu meant.

"The darkened colors, dulled senses, create a vivid image of someone's spark flickering. A light going out, or someone's brightness starting to dim. These are all such depressing things to imagine." Tsuyu seemed lost in her own thought, and Uraraka couldn't help being transfixed at the words she spoke, and how she spoke them. "but at the same time, the lack of color lessens the need for attentiveness. Like someone staying in bed to relax during a rainstorm, or reading a book after the sun has set. The dimming of color provides less distraction, more strength for self reflection or preservation."

Uraraka followed along, albeit a little bit behind. So basically, Tsuyu was saying that the dimming of light was an inherently upsetting idea, but in practice offered an opportunity for positive growth through less distraction. Or as least something along those lines.

"And you notice the colors on the edges on the canvas, how they have a sharpness to them?" She circled her pointer finger around the outer edges of the painting to prove her point, "and yet in the middle the colors blend together, almost making one singular consistency that's hard to tell apart?"

Uraraka was following what she was saying, noticing herself how peculiar of an observation it was. If she remembered correctly, the only way the paint had been applied onto the canvas was through Uraraka's younger self throwing paint onto the canvas at random. So, considering that all of the space had been covered using the same thought process and technique, it was rather peculiar that the edges were indeed much sharper than the center.

"In photography, you are taught that straight lines steal the attention away from the rest of the picture. Some people use this to their advantage and bring attention to certain parts of their photograph, but others come across the straight lines on accident and may accidentally draw people's attention away from the parts of the photograph that they were meaning to emphasize." Uraraka stared confused at Tsuyu, who smiled. "I was really into taking pictures when I was in middle school. I took some classes. I sold my camera a couple months ago."

"So in the case of the painting, the lines on the outer edges bring attention away from the center of the painting, where all of the different colors mixed together to create a pool that looks beautiful." Uraraka couldn't help staring mesmerized at Tsuyu, who seemed entranced by the painting. It made her blush, seeing someone so intuitive towards something she made as a kid. It was nice though, sharing her likeness of something with someone else.

"Not that I know what any of that means, I'm sure it's open to different interpretations depending on how you look at it or what mood you're in." Tsuyu said this somewhat suddenly, looking away from the painting and instead looking at her phone screen once again.

Tsuyu's words made Uraraka look at the painting on her wall differently, like it was somehow given new meaning from the words Tsuyu spoke. She may have been the one who created it, but this updated perspective offered some value. But she had to wonder what any of this had to do with what she was going through, if it did at all. Maybe Tsuyu was just making idle conversation.

"Shouldn't… ahem… shouldn't you still be in class?" She had to stop midway through the question to clear her throat, but Uraraka finally spoke up nonetheless

"The class period isn't over yet, if that's what you're asking." Tsuyu gazed at the clock on her wrist, "There's still like 20 minutes left."

"How did you manage to escape from Eraser Head?" Uraraka continued.

"Your dramatic screams made everyone start to get up to check on you, but I was the only one who actually got out of the room. Eraser Head must have been focused on everyone else."Tsuyu answered simply, here eyes not moving from her phone.

And here it came, the part where Tsuyu started talking about how much everyone cared about her, how all of her classmates were worried sick and were willing to go against Eraser Head just to make sure she was okay. She cringed internally, mentally preparing for the one thing she didn't want to hear.

"They're all idiots."

Wait, what?

"I get that they cared, but it was still pretty thoughtless the way they went about it." Tsuyu said with a scowl, "Did they even think about how you felt? How did they honestly think you were going to react if you had 20 people chasing you to your dorm?"

She was right, that was something that she had been very adamant about avoiding. Heck, she didn't even want to see Tsuyu when she first arrived, much less the 20 other people from her class.

The way that Tsuyu spoke was reassuring, almost like an older sibling guiding their younger sister down a path that they may have already gone through. Not that Uraraka thought Tsuyu had lost her parents or gone through anything similar, but still. She wouldn't say that the words Tsuyu spoke made everything better, but… they helped.

"Well, class is finally letting out and I should probably meet everyone at the battle arena. I think I've gotten a long enough break." Tsuyu stood from her seat, flattening the skirt she wore with the back of her hands. "Don't try coming with me, you really need some sleep."

Honestly, the whole situation since Tsuyu had arrived made her seem so… cool. The way she spoke was so eloquent, and the words she said were the right balance of reassuring yet not condescending. She really couldn't have asked for a better friend to come through in her time of need.

Not needing to be told twice, Uraraka settled back into her bed, pulling the covers up to her chin. Tsuyu looked back at her as she made her way to the door, a smile crossing her face.

"I would tell you to feel better, but I'm sure you're already trying."

'So… cool…'

And with that, Tsuyu stepped out of the room and shut the door behind her. Uraraka's gaze was transfixed on the spot where Tsuyu had disappeared, almost waiting for her to come back into her frame of vision. She had to shake her head to break out of the trance, and that fact alone made her blush.

Something about Tsuyu had put her at ease, her presence giving her a warmth that she couldn't have imagined from anywhere else.

Uraraka blushed.


	4. Interlude I

Chapter four! Hey! Sick! Gnarly!

Thanks so much to the people checking this story out and following along if ya like it, it really means a lot. I put a lotta time into my writing because I love doing it, but even so it's nice seeing that people actually enjoy it. Y'all are sick. Gnarly.

X

There was a constant, shallow dripping coming from the other side of the darkened corridor he grew accustomed to calling his home, not that anyone ever thought to ask. A single drop every three seconds, increasing in volume until a fever pitch marked the start of a new cycle. It was the closest thing to a clock he had, not that he was complaining. He wasn't forgetful, he always remembered exactly how many droplets had fallen and how many hours had passed. At present, it was twenty minutes past midnight. He was late.

Scratching his open palm with an opposite hand, a crook in his neck brought an uncomfortable stinging sensation. Rotating his head in an attempt to jostle whatever the cause had been, he momentarily took his attention away from the droplets. Fuck. He lost count.

The sudden frustration stole his attention from the palm he scratched, the momentary lapse in focus resulting in a deep, self inflicted cut that almost immediately began flowing a crimson liquid onto the wet ground beneath his feet. He frowned. He hated when that happened.

Picking back up where he left off, he felt out the rhythm of the droplets as they fell once again. He was forced to assume that he had missed at least a minute's worth of sound (he truly hated assuming), and continued the countdown from where he left off. But this time, the droplets were delayed by fractions of a second. Someone was there.

"Brother? BROTHER?"

"Relax, Tzasu." A sudden grip on his shoulder and a familiar voice whispering into his ear proved enough to dull his sudden panic, bringing his heart rate down to it's normal speed again. Jesus. Was he trying to kill him?

"You need to learn to relax, brother." The voice rang out again, the spacious surroundings reverberating every sound. "You knew to be expecting me. No one else knows of this place."

"You were late!" He spat, remaining motionless in the office chair he sat upon. His eyes still closed, he scratched at the incessant itch contained within his newly bleeding palm.

"You must stop with this," The older of the two gripped tightly onto the hand the former used to scratch, pulling it forcefully from his body. The younger of the two gave a snarl at the sudden interruption, the desire to scratch himself being an almost nervous tick not unlike someone desiring to bite their finger nails. The moment the older brother's grip weakened, he went right back to scratching his palm like nothing had happened. The older brother could only sigh, diverting his gaze from the action that he himself saw as considerably gross.

"And regardless of my arrival time, which was only delayed by a couple minutes," he snatched a pocket watch from the inside pocket of the jacket he wore, clicking his tongue in annoyance over his brother's over reaction, "The rush we are in is unnecessary. Cautiousness is something we cannot afford to overlook, and rushing gives opportunity for mistake."

The younger brother did not respond for a long while, as if not hearing what had been said or instead choosing to completely ignore the warning. The older brother furrowed his brow as a frown overcame his lips. Telling his brother something that he didn't want to hear always brought about a similar response, and it was beginning to frustrate him beyond words. A problem such as this would have normally ruined any potential for a fruitful companionship, but familial ties didn't really give him any other options. His face relaxed as he calmed himself, deciding that this wasn't something worth arguing over.

"After you then, I guess."

This must have been something the younger brother had wanted to hear, for his reaction was an almost instantaneous one. He stood from the chair he had been resting in and walked forward, placing his non bleeding hand onto the concrete wall in front of him and letting out a grunt of effort. There were a couple moments of no reaction before a loud rumbling filled the empty air, reverberating throughout the barren space they found themselves in. Where the wall had at one time been thick and solid, a small crevice began inching it's way wider and wider until eventually there had been an opening big enough for the two brothers to fit through. They made their way inside, squeezing through the extended opening as they approached the reason behind their getting together in the first place. The older brother was forced to suck in his protruding gut to fit through the tiny space, and he couldn't help assuming that his brother had purposely made the opening as small as it was as a kind of revenge against his previous criticisms. He frowned again only momentarily, a moment later regaining his composure.

The slowing movements from his younger brother in front of him showed that they had reached their destination, finally. The older of the two took a few careful steps backwards, giving his brother room to use the same motions from earlier to open a second entrance that lead to their final destination.

As the walls split a fair bit wider, the bright lights from what almost looked like a hospital room invaded the dark crevice in which they found themselves. The older brother covered his eyes, giving them a few seconds to get settled in the brightness. After a moment, he stepped through the opening a few paces behind his brother.

"Like I said, they aren't going anywhere." The older brother smirked at the small victory he obtained, gaining even more pleasure from the grunt that his younger brother responded with. As he continued forward, he ran his hand across one of the countless test tubes that lined either side of the walls.

The test tubes were many, easily numbering in the hundreds if he were forced to guess. There were but centimeters in between each container, and even one light collision could send them all down a destructive path as though they were dominoes, shattering onto the ground as they fell. The two brothers were careful not to make that mistake.

Inside the containers were thick masses of what looked to be blackened, disformed clumps of human flesh. The only clue that they were anything more than thick balls of clay was the incessant vibrations that came from them, as though they were trying to gasp for the air that they had no way of receiving. Aside from the fact that they had not grown their lungs yet, they swam in a putrid green liquid that looked uncomfortably similar to mucus. The older brother remembered the sickened feeling he got when he first saw the room, but now they were nothing more than familiar decorations that he had grown accustomed to seeing. He wasn't sure if he was happy or worried about his growing tolerance of disgusting things like this.

In the back of the room, a lone desk carrying a rather expensive looking computer sat in what looked to be the only relatively open area in the room. There was only one chair in front of said computer though, one that he knew his younger brother would throw a fit about not having if he were to try and sit down himself. His brother always got the comfier spots, it seemed, while he was stuck standing around and doing all of the dirty work. He was the one that had to fill all of these tubes with the experiments, after all.

The younger brother sat at the chair in front of the computer and typed quickly a boot up code that resulted in a loud humming as it began to turn on. As the younger brother waited for the start up screen, the older brother took the opportunity to ensure that everything was plugged in correctly. He followed the lone wire protruding from the back of the electronic, following it down the room as it plugged into the bottom of each individual test tube. Everything looked to be working fine, not that they ever didn't. Aside from the two of them them, nobody knew that this place existed; much less someone who would try to sabotage their work. Better safe than sorry though, as they say.

The younger brother, with a few more keystrokes, brought the whole place to life. The mucus looking liquid began to glow with a neon brightness, and the various electronics attached to each of the tubes began whirring and beeping in seemingly random sequences. The older brother grimaced once again, quickly shoving his fingers in his ears to drown out the oncoming vocal assault. He always hated this part.

Without warning, cries and screeches from each of the tube's inhabitants filled the air and condensed into a singular, almost white noise that felt louder than the speakers of even the largest of stadiums. It was times like this where he was happy that they decided to base their lab in an area surrounded by literal tons of thick metal to drown out and keep the sound from escaping to the outside world. It was times like this that he also hated the placement, as the sound had nowhere to escape to and instead grew only louder and louder before cutting itself off abruptly.

The younger brother let out a sigh when the sounds had stopped, shaking his head in relief before starting to scratch his palm yet again. The older brother had no idea how the younger of the two managed to bear the sounds of the test subjects without anything to protect his ears, much less how he did so without losing his hearing. Or maybe he was starting to lose hearing, that would explain his prissy attitude. There was no real way of knowing.

And with that, the two brothers observed the creatures surrounding them as their behaviour began to adjust to the newly awakened electronics. The lulled vibrations turned into solid thumps, almost as if they were following the rhythm of a singular heart beat. The palpitations were strong and constant, and the two brothers could only watch in a mixture of fascination and disgust as the blood in the veins of the test subjects surged through their bodies at significant speeds.

The creatures were experiencing what the two brothers could only describe as an enhanced period of growth and evolution. The blackened spheres had been millions of human skin cell tissues, attaching themselves side by side to each other but never fully becoming one to create a singular creature. There hadn't been just one thing in each of the tubes, instead they were filled with millions of things. And with the individuality they all shared, they each took to the enhanced periods of growth in their own special ways.

The cells would die in the hundreds of thousands every couple of seconds, turning themselves into food for the other cells if they could not adapt quickly enough to the time that was passing. They had to be strong and adaptable, else they were useless and deserved only death. Not to personify the cells necessarily, even the thought of that made the two brothers shudder. They may have been doing what could have easily viewed as 'immoral', but they were not murderers.

"Great progress today, it seems. Come look, brother!" The younger of the two called out to his older brother, waving him over to the tube he stood beside. The two of them gazed into the liquid in awe of the progress they were seeing. "Looks like we have finally gotten our first leg."

The small black clump had grown a protruding limb, waving back and forth in what they could only assume was an act of curiosity. These cells had no idea what was happening to them, after all, so this growth must have been as much a shock to them as it had been to the brothers.

They both beamed as they looked at the creation, warped smiles spreading across the entire width of their faces. They have been running this experiments for months, but this was the first time they had seen such significant progress. This discovery could only bode well for the future. If one cell had finally adapted the need for limbs, it was only a matter of time before the other creatures in the room would follow suit.

"I think that this calls for an end in today's activity." The older brother remarked, running his hand along the glass in front of him. "This significant of a change may prove too potent for the others to keep up with at the moment, and I do not wish to have to deal with a catastrophic shut down again."

The younger brother shuddered at the mention of such a bleak hypothesis, but had to agree. It may have been difficult to halt and call it a day when they had just witnessed so much progress being made, but it was surely for the best. They would be back, after all. To quote his older brother, 'rushing gives opportunity for mistake.'

The head computer was shut off within seconds, and the tubes surrounding the room followed suit soon after. The bright neon lights dulled until they had completely disappeared, and the seemingly active clumps of cells returned back into their sleeping state as their pulsing had returned to its original vibrations.

The two brothers made their way to the exit without a word, beginning their travel back to the outside world. The two brothers may not have spoken aloud, but it went without saying that the two of them would be celebrating that night.


	5. Last Time

Chapter 5! Whoa, this story is really getting itself going! This semester sure did take a tole on my writing, huh? I'm back from it now though, and now that I have a lot more free time (for a couple weeks at least), I'm hoping to pump out a lot more of this fic. Thanks to everyone who has stuck around or is just finding it now, love u 3

Thanks for stopping by, thanks so much to the people faving and following and reviewing this story, it really does mean a lot! I'm excited about how well this is doing, especially in comparison to the other stories I've written over the years :)

But enough from me, let's get this chapter goin.

X

Tsuyu's words had been lingering in her head for a good while at that point, but it was still difficult not to spiral back into the same darkness that she was stuck in only hours before. Especially now that the sun was beginning to set and the room was now almost pitch black, a darker atmosphere had begun to enter the space. With nothing in the room visible, there was nothing to distract her; and with nothing to distract her, she caught herself digging within the darker confines of her preoccupied mind. On one hand she wanted to stop herself; but on the other, she had an almost morbid fascination towards what might happen if she refused to stop herself. It was weird. She felt weird.

She eventually decided to pull herself forcefully out of her thoughts with an aggressive shake of her head and a tired groan. Tsuyu had put the effort into giving her friend a reprieve, and she would have felt guilty if she simply dismissed it in pursuit of a morbid curiosity that she could hardly understand. Guilt seemed to be influencing a lot of her decisions lately, now that she thought about it.

Uraraka stretched her tired limbs, remembering then that it had easily been at least ten hours of her laying unmoving in her bed as she drifted in and out of sleep. That, along with the time she spent sleeping in Recovery Girl's office, probably meant that she had slept for over thirty hours in the past two days. The dull ache in her muscles told Uraraka that her body didn't appreciate that fact very much.

But more so than her over abundance of sleep, it was a nagging boredom that eventually inspired her to lean forward and start to get out of her bed. She hadn't moved from her bed to do anything productive, and a fear of delving too deep into her mind left her in a blank, nearly comatose state. She needed some kind of stimulation, something to give her brain something to contemplate that wouldn't end up hurting her. And the only solution she could think of was to wander outside of her bedroom, as unappealing as that thought had been earlier in the day.

She put her feet onto the ground and slowly lifted herself, allowing her legs time to adjust to her weight. They were definitely wobbly and tired, but nothing a short walk couldn't fix. Honestly, she was surprised at how well her body was holding up considering how weak she had been and how long she spent sleeping. She spent a couple seconds stretching out her legs, getting the blood circulating through them once again. She grabbed her phone from atop her covers and flipped the light switch on before stepping out the door.

The simple act of being in the dorm hallway while the sun was down was giving her flashbacks from a few days prior, ones that she was quick to push away. She knew that dwelling on things would be harmful, as much as everything seemed to drive her to do so. She walked down the familiar hallway, making her way to the common area. There had to be something interesting happening there, there always was.

She walked into the common area and gave a small wave to the students who inhabited. The timing was just right for most of the students to start tunneling into the space, she pondered. Enough time had passed since class was let out for everyone to give themselves time to recover and shower themselves clean of grime and sweat, something that she herself was happy to have accomplished hours prior. She had beaten the rush by a little bit though, as she could tell from the relatively small amount of students who sat upon the couches. In the corner, she recognized the spiked hair of Bakugo and a figure that she recognized as Shoto both hunched over one of the many tables. She figured them as good conversation partners as anyone else in the room.

As she made her way to the two boys, she couldn't help being made uncomfortable by the burning gazes of the other students in the room. The looks she got in class that morning were one thing, but following her outburst from earlier in the day they had only gotten that much more inquisitive. She didn't like it. She wanted to tell them to mind their own business, but couldn't help realizing that if she had been in their position she would be acting the same way. It was hypocritical, but she couldn't help it.

"Whatchu guys up to?" She spoke up, stepping into one of the unoccupied corners of the table. The two boys looked up to her with rather noticeable flinches, but offered a greeting nonetheless. They must have been surprised to see her out and about again so soon.

"If we tell you, are you just gonna run away screaming again?" There was a moment's hesitation before he spoke, but Bakugo still gave an expected answer soaked in a mix of sarcasm and aggression.

"Hey!" Shoto forcefully shoved his elbow into Bakugo's side, the boy reacting with a pained 'oof'. Uraraka appreciated the thought, but at this point she came to expect Bakugo to be an insensitive jerk. If it had been anyone else she would have been offended, but since it came from him she could settle for an embarrassed blush that crossed her cheeks. She adjusted her gaze slightly, momentarily too embarrassed to look directly at the boy who had just pointed out her blatant weakness.

"Him aside…" Shoto continued, shooting a nasty glare in Bakugo's direction, "We were just looking over our evaluations from class today."

She should have expected as much, considering that almost all of the more diligent students in the school spent almost all of their free time outside of class either evaluating themselves or examining evaluations written by outside sources, namely the teachers. The school made a point of incentivizing study for ALL the classes the students took, but it was to be expected that they would all most likely spend the majority of their time focusing on the one class that would most directly effect their hero work. The better they did in the battle simulations, after all, the stronger they would have been in the field.

"I'm sorry I couldn't be there," Uraraka apologized somewhat awkwardly, but quickly changed the topic, "So what did you guys find out?"

"Izuku is freaking useless," Bakugo muttered under his breath bitterly, and was soon after met once again with Shoto's elbow pounding his side. "Ow! I'm not wrong!"

"If you had been able to read Izuku's signals you wouldn't have been taken captive so easily." Shoto was quick to correct Bakugo, "It wasn't his fault he couldn't save you. Besides, since you were the one that was taken captive, wouldn't that make 'you' the useless one?"

"Shut it, idiot!" Shoto's insult finally gave the excuse Bakugo needed to retaliate, an excuse he quickly took advantage of by sending a fist into his side. Shoto recoiled slightly, but a satisfied smile stuck to his face. It was always fun to get a rise out of Bakugo, even if it meant a couple bruises.

"Hey guys, y'all need to calm down…" Uraraka quickly calmed the two boys before the argument had a chance to escalate any further. Shoto may have been joking around, but Uraraka knew that Bakugo sooner rather than later would have taken offense to something he said and instigate a full on brawl.

"This wouldn't even be a problem if 'you' were there! Heck, even that useless bird brain Fumikage would have come in handy." Bakugo started his sentence aggressively, but it soon turned into little more than pouting. Still, Bakugo's words struck a chord in Uraraka's brain.

"Fumikage!" She spoke aloud, cursing herself for prolonging a visit to her friend. Especially after he had put his life on the line to try and protect her family, there really was no excuse. Her mind may have been reacting uncontrollably to the facts that she had discovered earlier in the day, but that offered no forgiveness for ignoring the person responsible for potentially saving her life. She didn't want to imagine how things would have turned out if Fumikage hadn't been there to save her from the cloaked man's full attention.

It was then that she remembered the state that she had last seen him in, and an anxious uncertainty began filling her heart. She remembered the dark bruises and deep gashes littering his skin, and even the mental image was enough to make her stomach turn. She had to go check on him, she simply had to. She had full faith in Recovery Girl's capabilities, but she still had a nagging apprehension in the back of her head.

"Do you have any idea where he might be?" Uraraka questioned quickly, all of a sudden supremely eager to exit the conversation. The two boys glanced at each other with concerned looks on their faces. They both gulped.

"Well… he really wasn't in a good spot when he got here…" Shoto started after a moment of silence, as if waiting to see if Bakugo would speak up first. Truth be told, Shoto wished that he had. "And I feel like you've seen enough traumatic stuff over the past however long you've been back."

The boy had a point, Uraraka couldn't help but agree with what he was saying. Her heart still hung heavy and the new information in her brain still made her head pound painfully, and she honestly wasn't sure exactly how she would react. She wasn't exactly showing the best efforts in self control recently. But still, something deep down in her consciousness told her that she needed to go see him, even for a moment at least.

"He was with me when everything happened…" Uraraka's head hung low, but she quickly perked back up. This was no time to be hinting at anything other than a powerful resolve to get her way. "He saved me back there! It isn't right for me to just pretend that nothing happened to him!"

Bakugo and Shoto shot concerned glances at each other once again, worried that this display of charisma wasn't going to last. It was a feeling that they both shared. But even so, they both gave sighs of defeat.

"He should be in the intensive care unit, by Recovery Girl's office." Shoto noticed instantly as Uraraka's face dropped, "I told you he was in a tough spot!"

"Don't make us regret telling you this."

Bakugo was quick to get straight to the point, skipping past any emotional turmoil that any of them had. He shot Uraraka a look that seemed almost like a warning, a face that seemed to tell her 'if you freak out again, I'm gonna come after you'. She could only shrink underneath the threat and offer a halfhearted nod in response. It seemed to be enough for Bakugo though, who nodded himself and affixed back into the studying of his training. Shoto soon followed suit, taking the hint that the conversation between all of them had concluded. Uraraka offered a flat farewell as she walked away, knowing that the two boys were too engrossed in their studies to pay her any mind.

She set out for the school yet again that day, a familiar unease once again surrounding her chest. It was only Fumikage, she reminded herself, so what did she have to be so afraid of?

A part of her clued in on the idea that Fumikage's wounds would just be a stubborn reminder that this all hadn't just been a bad dream, which was an idea that Uraraka unconsciously clung to with desperation. In spite of her disagreeing with the sentiment, she couldn't help daydreaming about how relieving it would be to suddenly jerk awake in her bed only to find out that everything had just been a figment of her imagination. It wasn't exactly a plausible idea, but it was one she hoped for nonetheless.

And Fumikage would bring that daydream crumbling back into the world of the harsh reality she now found herself inhabiting, one that only seemed to be getting worse and worse with each passing moment. Every period of self progression being met with an equally degrading moment of weakness that would force her backwards as many steps as she thought she had taken forward. Fumikage would be the tangible evidence that the situation lacked, the beck and call assuring her that everything she thought she saw happen actually did. All of the happenings that he was awake for, at least, considering he was quick to be incapacitated by the attacker.

And not to mention, the intense feeling of responsibility she felt towards the seemingly life threatening injuries that Fumikage had taken. She was the one with reaction time too slow to accurately perceive the situation as it happened, she was the one who let the dark thoughts in her head distract her from keeping the two of them safe. She didn't want to beat a dead horse considering that the feeling had a way of popping up incessantly recently, but the responsibility would oftentimes turn itself into a manifestation of the guilt that she carried.

She would apologize to Fumikage, she finally decided upon with a decisive pumping of her fist. Recovery Girl would have most likely brought the boy back to a stable and healthy state by now, so hopefully an earnest apology would be all it took to move past things. These thoughts swam in her head as she reached the door of the urgent care department of the school.

She had never actually stepped foot into the intensive care unit, partly because it was scarcely used. Considering Recovery Girl's considerable power, most all injuries were oftentimes resolved as soon as she got a hold of them. Heck, there were some injuries that Uraraka had seen Recovery Girl use her powers on to fix in no time that didn't look like they would ever get better. With that thought process in mind, Uraraka began contemplating the idea that she may have been underestimating the physical state Fumikage had been in. He was in a place strictly for emergencies, after all. She quickly brushed away the oncoming panic, realizing that focusing on something so unnecessary would only bring negative results. She didn't want to dwell on something she could no longer control.

The front counter was occupied by a rather bored looking student who didn't seem to notice that Uraraka had walked into the room, instead her attention was placed onto the generic looking waiting room magazine that she flipped through rather quickly. Uraraka couldn't blame the girl for her obvious disinterest considering she had probably been the only person to walk into the place that day. Uraraka stepped to the counter, hoping that her presence alone would soon enough break the girl from her trance. A few moments following, she finally peered away from the magazine and met Uraraka's gaze.

"Yes?" She was short, intimidating in the annoyed aura she enveloped herself in. She might not have had a lot to do at her position, but that didn't mean she wanted to deal with anyone. Uraraka was slow to respond, gulping down her apprehension before she spoke.

"I'm here to see…" She paused, momentarily glancing at the name of the magazine between the girl's fingers. As she thought, it was a generic celebrity gossip magazine spelling out all the personal details of the cities heroes. In particular, the girl was turned to a page speaking of a top hero's supposed love interest. The pictures on the page were obviously taken without the consent of the hero they were taking pictures of, as they looked to be on a simple coffee date, and that made her feel uncomfortable. She finally broke attention from the magazine, noticing the further annoyed look that came upon the receptionist's face as she waited for the girl in front of her to finish her sentence.

"Sorry," Uraraka apologized awkwardly, receiving only a 'hmph' in response. "I'm here to see Fumikage, he should have been put in here a couple days ago."

"Appreciate your help with me doing my job." The girl's words were laced with a thick layer of sarcasm as she spoke while digging through the files next to her desk. Uraraka blushed harshly, all of a sudden feeling extremely stupid. It didn't really help her find his file by telling her that he had only been there a couple days. It really wasn't a big deal, but Uraraka had a feeling that this girl was really good at making people feel stupid about equally stupid things.

"He's in room 208. I'll need your name for the guest book." She closed the filing cabinet and put a pencil to the sheet in front of her, impatiently waiting for the name of the visiting girl.

"uhm…" She hesitated for only a moment, and wasn't sure why. "Uraraka Ochako."

After a few scribbles of her pencil,the girl pointed Uraraka in the right direction and let her through. Uraraka felt relieved, the social interaction being far more tiresome than she anticipated. She couldn't help a relieved sigh from leaving her lips as she made her way towards the end of the hall that the girl had pointed her towards.

The farther down into the corridor she got, the less bright the bulbs overhead seemed to shine. A dark hue surrounded the area, providing a rather ominous atmosphere even after Uraraka tried to dismiss the lackluster lighting as a result of infrequent use. A sudden urge to scratch her arm erupted, one that she carefully used the palm of her damaged hand to rub away.

The door had been slightly ajar, a telling of the fact that somebody had been inside the room relatively recently. Knowing Fumikage and how her class dealt with the injuries of their friends, it wasn't hard to imagine the amount of visitors he must have gotten. Especially while in the emergency wing, a place that had a rather grim history with patients. Still, Uraraka knocked lightly on the door.

"Come in."

The voice that spoke was hoarse and weak, but still recognizably Fumikage. The tone in which he spoke sent a shiver down Uraraka's spine, but she still nonetheless entered the room as was permitted.

He lay on a bed in the corner of the room, his head resting on a couple pillows as he looked up at the TV on the wall in front of him. An unrecognizable sit com was playing, and that alone was enough to tell the amount of channels the room provided; not many. Fumikage was barely paying attention to what was on the screen as was noticeable from his eyes being almost halfway shut, but he continued watching nonetheless.

Next to the bed, a figure that Uraraka couldn't immediately recognize sat on the only other chair in the room opposite the one Uraraka was standing next to. She held her gaze on the screen for a moment, waiting for a certain dialogue to conclude in the show, then adjusted her face to look towards Uraraka. There was a look of confusion as she wracked her brain in an attempt to recognize the new visitor in front of her, but that look was soon replaced by an anger that Uraraka could feel noticeably raising the temperature of the room. Uraraka wasn't sure who this person was or for what reason they could have had for being mad at her, but she visibly shrunk nonetheless.

She was a crow with a similar look to Fumikage's, though her eyes were a brighter shade of red; almost a dark purple. She wore a large t-shirt that fell down past her knees as she sat and what looked to be a pair of pajama pants, a hint towards her intent to sleep in Fumikage's room that night. Uraraka could guess that the woman had been a family member to Fumikage, her young age implying that she was maybe a sister or a niece.

"Calm yourself, Aimi." Fumikage raised an open palm in the girl's direction, who calmed herself only slightly. The air in the room was still thick, and Uraraka was finding it difficult to breathe.

What followed was a deep moment's hesitation as the room's air hung heavy, a constricting feeling keeping all of their throats dry and mouths unspeaking. Uraraka thought that visiting Fumikage would be a happy occasion, or at least one that would be significantly less difficult than it was currently being. But the way that Fumikage and his sister remained motionless following her entrance, and the lights that hung overhead that served only to lighten the room in a dull, pale silhouette made the atmosphere that much more intense. Uraraka wasn't getting any better at dealing with these tense moments.

There was a waiting contest of sorts, a waiting to see which one of them would speak up next. Being the visitor, Uraraka had taken it that she was the most expected of the three to speak up, but she still hoped for one of the other two to say something that would have lightened the mood before she did. When it was clear that there would be no such reprise, Uraraka swallowed the lump in her throat as she began to open her mouth.

"I don't feel justified in being mad at you."

As she opened her mouth to speak, she was cut off by Fumikage's words. She looked down at him, seeing as his knuckles began turning white as they gripped the sheets below him for dear life. Uraraka was taken aback, surprised at the negativity that laced his words. She wasn't exactly sure what she was expecting, but a reaction such as this certainly wasn't something she had prepared for.

"But I still am." Fumikage lifted his head to finally meet Uraraka's gaze. But his eyes read a devastating story, one that was filled with an intense hatred pointed right towards the brunette in front of him. This was enough for Uraraka to shrink under the intense weight being placed on her shoulders, and she still couldn't fathom any kind of response.

"It may be that I am still hurt over this, still stuck in a pit over where I am… and _what_ I am now." Fumikage grit his teeth as he spoke again, once again lowering his gaze to stare at the blank sheets below him. "But right now I can't think straight, right now I don't know if I care."

Fumikage's sister finally interjected with a calming hand being put on the bed where his legs lie. She rubbed the spot reassuringly, unable herself to look up from her legs that twitched restlessly. She wouldn't be stepping in to save Uraraka anytime soon, that was certain.

But Fumikage's words still floated inside her head, curiosities arising hundreds of questions that she wanted to ask. There was so much more to this than she had come to discover, she realized. And she wasn't sure where to start with getting more of the story.

"What you… are?" Uraraka spoke meekly, her voice barely rising above a whisper. But this breaking of the ice was enough to inspire a flurry of questions to escape her lips."What… do you mean? Are you still hurt? Did Recovery Girl help you? What is going _on?!_ "

Fumikage sat patiently, waiting for all of the questions Uraraka had gathered to be spoken. He was unsurprised by what was asked, but knew that one answer would prove enough to answer everything that she wondered.

"Recovery Girl did all that she could, but the damage done was too strong for even her to handle." He spoke calmly, though it was obvious that doing so was taking a lot of effort from him. He wanted to blow up, releasing all of his frustration onto the meek girl that stood before him. But he knew that would be unfair, though that justification was only doing so much to hold him back.

Uraraka was once again taking back, realizing again that she had never much heard of Recovery Girl's inability to fix any injuries that the students may have gotten. Even in as intense of a situation as the one at her house, there was no clear indication to show that the aftermath would be as devastating as it had proven to be. Uraraka losing the majority of her powers, and now Fumikage being bedridden. She had taken the whole thing lightly.

"What do you mean Recovery Girl couldn't do anything?" The question was laced with a desperation that she couldn't hide as she flung her arms to the side exasperatedly, "What's gonna happen to you?"

"What is going to happen has already happened," Fumikage spoke again, closing his eyes and turning away from the girl. "I will never walk again."

It was as if a bomb had been dropped on top of her head, a heavy weight flung onto her shoulders without any care of whether or not she could carry it. Her heart sunk deep into her chest, and her mouth fell open with a million words she couldn't figure out how to say.

Fumikage would never walk again? What of the powers he possessed, of the potential the he had? Was that all wasted now, a time that had come and passed? How would he be able to stay in the academy? Oh god, would he be able to stay in the academy?

Fumikage remained unmoving as a million thoughts swam through Uraraka's head. The only one in the room who had any kind of semblance of control over themselves was Fumikage's sister, who looked to be projecting all of the hatred that she carried onto Uraraka. The gaze burned Uraraka's skin, who recoiled in a mixture of guilt and fear.

"And it's your fault!" She spoke without warning, spitting these words towards the brunette like weapons, and every syllable looked to have hit their target. Uraraka was now in physical pain, her stomach turning as she fought back the urge to vomit. All of the malice, all of the stress, it had been building up inside of her and now it seemed to be overflowing even more-so than before. She remained motionless, unable to think of anything to say. At the moment, she couldn't see the flaw in Aimi's logic.

"You were the one to drag him into this, you were the one that got him involved!" Aimi stood from her seat, taking heavy steps towards the silent girl who was now fighting against the wetness collecting in her tear ducts. "It isn't fair!"

Fumikage had come of his own accord, he had volunteered himself to follow along with her. And honestly, Uraraka wasn't sure how she would have survived the encounter if he hadn't. But even still, with all of these facts evident, she still couldn't bring herself to speak up. The words got caught in her throat, and any attempts to spit them out only made it harder for her to hold back the tears that threatened to spill.

Aimi clenched her fists, Uraraka's silence only provoking her farther. A second later, she closed the gap between the two of them in only a moment and swung a tightly clenched fist towards Uraraka's face. Uraraka was too slow to react in time, and was met with a powerful collision that forced her off balance.

"fuck…" Uraraka cursed on impulse, feeling the welt that was beginning to form on her cheek. At the very least, the punch had awakened an adrenaline in her that brought forth an anger she didn't know she possessed. All of the pent up feelings inside of her chest were begging to be released, set free through the anger that she was having a hard time relenting. She knew she wasn't thinking straight, but at the moment she couldn't have cared less.

She turned to Aimi with her own fists now clenched, "He came on his own! I never asked for him to come! He did this to himself!"

As soon as the last sentence left her mouth she regretted it, her chest burning almost in retaliation to the hurtful thing she had said. She worriedly glanced over at Fumikage, who's head was now dropped into his lap, as if hiding from the world. The image was enough to kill the adrenaline the Uraraka had unknowingly gathered. Aimi was less than amused.

"How dare you say that!"

She swung once again, connecting with the opposite side of Uraraka's face with what felt like twice as much force as the first time. This was enough to send Uraraka sprawling along the ground, landing uncomfortably on her backside that slammed powerfully into the floor beneath them. Not only was her face contorting and pulsating in pain, now she was halfway convinced she had broken her tailbone.

But she made no attempts to stand from the floor she had landed on, she made no attempts to even lift her gaze from where it was pointing towards the floor. She didn't know what to say, she felt like any attempts she would have made to rectify anything would have just made things worse. Aimi was frustrated by this, interpreting it as Uraraka refusing to take responsibility.

"Is this how U.A. students respond to the hardships of battle?!" Aimi accused, pointing a shaking finger towards the beaten down girl beneath her, "Do they wimp out and run away at the first sign of retaliation?!"

Uraraka could not respond, and at this point she had no desire to. There was nothing that could have rectified the situation, and all Uraraka could think to do was accept the verbal onslaught being sent towards her and hope that it wouldn't become any more physical than it already had. And even if the onslaught broke her down and destroyed her insides, it was all she could think to do to help alleviate the inner turmoil that was surely spiraling in Aimi's head. If being a punching bag is what it took to help the girl in front of her, she would gladly accept anything sent towards her.

"Or are you just a shining example of everything wrong with this god forsaken academy?!" Aimi's finger remained unmoving, though it seemed to become ever more accusatory with every word that she spoke. Uraraka did not respond. "If someone like my brother can be accepted into a place like this… people like you don't deserve to be here!"

Was she wrong?

Uraraka grimaced at the words, the verbal interpretation of everything that had crossed through Uraraka's head from the second she arrived in the school. She had always considered herself so lucky, she had always seen herself as a setback in anything that she had been a part of. She felt like a burden. And although she had never spoken these troubles aloud, Aimi's words were enough to heighten all of the insecurities that she had. Maybe she was right, maybe she didn't deserve to be there. Maybe she wasn't lucky, she was undeserving.

"If this school had any sense you would be gone from here before the morning started!" Aimi spat again, lowering her hand slowly. She turned away with an angered groan, clearly wanting to unload even farther onto the girl beneath her. But she seemed to have run out of words, and for that Uraraka was thankful.

The girl looked over at the crow in bed who was now looking away, a look of guilt crossing his features. But not a guilt over what his sister had said or a guilt over the way he had reacted to her words, instead it looked as though he were internally regretful of the way he seemed to agree with what his sister was saying. And in all the time that Uraraka had known Fumikage, she never expected to see him like this.

She stood without a word as Aimi sat back down at the seat beside Fumikage's bed, directing her attention towards the TV that had stayed on throughout the whole situation. She clearly wasn't following the plot of the show on the screen, but she needed anything to distract herself from the thick aura that had overtaken the whole room. Uraraka inspected herself for any noticeable damage, but was fortunate enough to only be met with a dull ache in the spots where she had taken collisions. She could think of nothing left to say, and instead quickly scurried out of the room without a word.

It was then, she decided, that she would no longer accept being a student at U.A.


End file.
